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First here's a recent article I read. While I was reading this, I felt like it said almost everything I had been wanting to say so here. Go read this :  Second, hey guys! I have been listening to classical hindi songs in different languages and man do I love it. I am fan of this girl. Here's the song that I am currently listening to.  Today is Sunday, April 17. Last night I had a small party with my friends and I was walking to my home at around 10, 11 ish. I was listening to this maya song by Aasutosh KC, and I loved it. The road was empty, it was just me and that cover along with the few lights on the way. It was magic. Again, I can't emphasize this enough, get yourself a good pair of headphones. I swear your life will change 😌. Also, that's my favorite emoji these days lol.  I don't really know what to write lol, I am not sure what this blog is supposed to consist of. Anyways, still waiting for my results from Microsoft, and preparing for my test for Pinterest....

I love youtube and the engineers, mathematicians, recruiters generally when we look at large for the youtube algorithm. I was recommended one of the cover songs and things just went wild from there.  I was feeling sad and down the whole day (kinda). To be honest, I haven't been really able to work quite effectively the whole past week. We had a standup meeting today and I lied that the feature was almost done, in reality it's far from done. But that's one thing I like about the job I have. Not that I can lie about things but they don't pressure you to do certain things in certain time. I will get that done eventually, but you know, just in general things haven't been great. I am stupid, I just think about the whole relationship too often. It's like I am frozen up in the time. I am still trying to process that fact that someone who said they loved me is just over it and now is getting married with someone in the span of few weeks.  Anyways, I was recommended this...

 Ok, if you've been reading the past few posts, I know I have complained a lot. See, the thing is it might sound like I complain a lot, but this blog is for me to rant when I am not feeling good. If you see the times of year I posted, you can clearly see I made no posts during the time I was in relationship with my ex. I was happy. There was no need for these blogs.  But, I'm back haha uninvited guests. I love this place. Man, I love blogger so much. And thank you google for making this free and again my nerd friends for making this. Love you beautiful human beings! Anyways I felt like I had been just flooding this place with just me feeling bad all the time. I feel quite good and productive today. I worked for 5 hours straight today. Which is something I am proud about. I know it's not lot but stuck with it. And as soon as I finish writing this blog, I will work for 4 hours more.  I am also eating healthy, I meant I ate healthy today lol. Which is again nice. The feeling...

Ok this quote just blew my mind  "You always think it's ungratefulness that makes people forget.. no its joy which makes people forget."  - Jagdish  (aka sadhguru but I don't like him calling that as he's not been my sadhguru yet.) If the other person is happy, and joyful and now has forgotten you, it's actually nice. It means that they are happy. The problem with which they came for you to solve has been solved.  "Nobody is obligated to be in your life. Years of commitment and love can go up in smoke because someone decided they were done with you" - u/DarkManX437 Also, loved this. I think we often think that things will be the same forever, and get into this illusion or wonderland. But, it is the truth. You don't own anyone, nobody is obligated to be in your life. You cannot force anyone to be with you.  Knowing self, and being with self is something that we don't really think about. I love that self-love is trendy these days. I had struggl...

Hi.  I never thought I would listen to Taylor Swift to heal myself. It's ironic because I listen to it because of my ex, and am I listening to forget about her. All to well, doesn't even resemble anything we had but its soothing somehow. I guess, it's the thought of moving on, which is powerful about this song.  I now only need to get a cup of ice cream and cry, and I think I'll become one of those teenage girls that you see in the movies. I have realized that it's more difficult to move on if the other person was not too bad, you know? I can't even hate her, like Taylor. I can't even say it was bad, and stuff you know? Because it wasn't.  I don't know what to write man, but I want to. It's midnight and I just listened to paper rings which she used to dedicate me and now I am listening to all too well. When all is not too well. I remember it all too well too but you know, it was good. How can I hate good memories. Anyways, is this too cringy? lol...

 Oh boy!! This was just the movie that I had to watch. Thanks to the overlords, the amazon prime algorithm! Thanks to that SWE who wrote that algorithm, and thanks to entire production casts of that movie, and their parents and their parents and theirs parents and you know all that stuff. Essentially, thank you universe for producing that movie.  And also duck you universe for putting me in the situation where I had had to watch that movie and feel good. Lol the irony! 

It's around 1 am and I am watching these wedding videos. Love it! Man, am having too much fun watching these wedding videos. K love you bye!  Ok.. it's me again. Last one..  Ok its 3:32 am now but one last one haha  Ok... It's 7 am, I took a shower and did some work, I didn't really sleep. But, another one just popped up in my recommendation.. this one just touched my heart, soul and just scrambled it all together but in a good way.  I've always seen men being on their knees, but when she went down on her knees while putting the ring damn.. Imma start manifesting this kind of relationship.  Now, I think I've gone from watching wedding videos to purpose videos lol. 

 Human beings are not inherently selfish. We are made to be like that.  If an alien sees kids from lets say taliban then they might think violence is the natural way people behave  But, if they see lets say someone in an ashram, it's completely different.  It's crazy why I didn't think of this before. People in the west preach about individualism and how everyone should care about themselves and the society is fucked up basically. People are depressed here more than anywhere in the world. There is no respect, everyone just thinks about themselves and "fuck others" because all the people are like that.  But, that's completely different from way people in japan behave for example or even Nepal. I am sad to correct my previous line *used to. Now, the west has corrupted our beliefs. Societies are breaking apart. Even if a relative has good intentions and tries to help you people are like 'Yeah fuck you bitch! mind your own business" or whatever cool kids ...

 Ok, first of all why? Why hate other people for who they are attracted to? This doesn't make any fucking, fucking any, fucking sense at all.  There's no set rule which says you can only be attracted to this type of organism. Ok ok when I think of it now, maybe there is. It should be within the same species. At least? Lol ok wait, I didn't think about this when I was starting to write this blog. But what if a person is attracted to panda? Is that right? Well, I think so, but what if a person wants to be in relationship with panda. Is that right? I guess the only thing would be to know if the panda wants to be in a relationship with the person. Which is kinda difficult to know.  But a thought experiment. If we had a technology that could tell us what a panda was thinking, and the panda wanted to be in an intimate relationship with a human being. How would we react. I'll be honest, I wouldn't feel comfortable with it. But why? Well, one reason, its not normal and I...

 https://www.reddit.com/r/nextfuckinglevel/comments/qx5iv7/every_father_is_superhero/ Man, these types of video just inspire me to do the best I can. Like you know, taking care of myself, being in touch with myself, and just becoming a better human being. If I ever decide to get married or just adopt kids, I want to be there for them and you know give them the best childhood and do my best to make them love themselves, and show that world is a nice place. Maybe inspire them to do something good and be selfless.  I wonder if my father used to think about all these stuff. I bet he did, but you don't really talk about your feelings in our community. Man, I love my dad, even though we don't have the best relationship a father and son could have, I am very grateful for what he has done for us. When I used to be a stupid kid (I still am btw.. not kid but stupid) I remember telling my dad that he hasn't accomplished much in life. Haha man I feel so bad and I laugh at myself at the...