Little steps

 Summary. 

1. Took little steps. 

2. Talking with bro about usual stuff 

3. Emotional breakdown. 

4. Emotional uplift

5. Career update. 

6. emotions in general.

Just took some little steps towards what I have always wanted to do. Feels good. I am so freaking happy. 

Also, I had decided to get completely off social media and stop writing this blog, but turns out social media is awesome. I love it. I also got one of my reels cross 10K views. That's the first K number that I've seen which is cool. I will try to balance everything now and continue talking little steps. 

Little steps are the building blocks of larger steps so ... you know? take little steps towards doing what you want to do. My therapist had suggested me that I it definitely works. 

I spent the whole night today talking with my brother about you know? the usual stuff morals, psychology , philosophies. And how in generations, our kids will finally know about their parents emotions, struggles and sufferings and also accomplishments and other stuff. This blog being the start of it. 

I had a emotional breakdown on Friday and had this huge ass post and I went skydiving the other day, and had the best day of my life. 

Also emailed my recruiter asking for the status of our interview and if we could extend the date for by a month or so. I am in a good pace and think it would really benefit. It's like one shot for me right now, so i want to make sure I do this right. I kinda didn't fully utilize the month of May and June which sucks, but I am confident about the coming days. 

No, you won't unknown. Unless, you decide to miss me that is .. I mean you cannn.. but you can just come back. 

I love what I am trying to do.. but still I question about writing and publishing some stuff. But again, I will try my best. Not everything is there to share, but I also don't want to just prioritize certain thoughts by publishing them, and just ignoring the rest. I think I need to be a little secure with myself, before I can completely be vulnerable. Also, why is vulnerable word attached with certain kind of emotions. That shouldn't be the case right. no matter what you are feeling you should be able to express it without the fear of shame or anything. It's a little complicated and a little difficult than writing it down here. But this also makes me think. 🧐 

I am writing not because of anything at the moment, but for the future, for people in the future ... to let them know kinda that emotions that you feel are ok. You don't need to think one way or other or questions yourself for feeling certain things. Everyone is messed up, to a certain extent. Insecure, jealously, feeling of not being enough, and not being able to amount to anything or achieve , or anything related to self-confidence, self-worth are natural. Not a lot of people will say or admit to this, but we all feel these things. So, my dear grandchild or kid who is just 10,11. It's ok buddy, I am 25 now and feel the same emotions, and I know what it's like to feel that way. So, you can always come talk to me, and I hope I have been successful to create an environment where you can do so. But, you can't always expect the best, and if you are reading this, yeah whether it be my grandkid, kid or someone else or just a teenager or an adult like me. It's ok. Your feelings are valid (one of my good friends said that to me and that made me feel good). 

Song of the day: This Town - Niall Horan

Your Very Own,

Handsome Charming Man.